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I’m by way of with hugs and kisses. Handshakes are the one reply | Adrian Chiles Categorical Occasions

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Some scenes are so awkward to observe that they actually shouldn’t be proven with out a warning: “Accommodates appalling awkwardness.” Footage of a photograph lineup at an EU summit final week was a working example. Croatia’s overseas minister, Gordan Grlić-Radman, is shaking arms together with his German counterpart, Annalena Baerbock, and leans ahead to kiss her. She type of turns away and this temporary however harrowing pantomime concludes with a discordant peck on her proper cheek.

The kisser acknowledged it was awkward and mentioned it was merely “a human method”; the Croatian ladies’s rights activist Rada Borić described the transfer as “extremely inappropriate”; the kissee, Frau Baerbock, has to my information handed no remark. And the entire sorry incident appears to have been forgotten.

However not by me. I can’t put it behind me. My toes gained’t uncurl. Clearly, there could effectively have been gender politics at play right here, however to me it seemed daft fairly than harmful. Then once more, I usually don’t have blokes I don’t know very effectively kissing me unbidden. In my case, partly to keep away from any kissing confusion, I’ve tended as an alternative to go in for hugs with ladies, which might be much more intimate and due to this fact worse. No extra. I by no means wish to be in that bloke’s sneakers, nor put any girl within the German overseas minister’s sneakers.

Significantly, any more, until I’m particularly informed in any other case, there can be no hugs or kisses from me, solely agency handshakes.

This hasn’t gone effectively to date. Filming one thing with Martin and Shirlie Kemp this week, I needed to greet them on digicam. I used to be a great 5 metres away after I thrust my hand ahead in Shirlie’s course. I noticed with alarm that she was shaping up for a hug however by then it was too late for me to withdraw. Awkward, awkward, awkward. After a short dialogue we re-shot it with a hug. This was showbiz, in spite of everything.

Adrian Chiles is a broadcaster, author and Guardian columnist

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